Crass Consumerist Christmas

black-fridayI’ve seen it every year, and this year brought no surprises. People rushing around from one retail locale to the next. Searching for the lowest-priced thing of choice to wrap in thin, cheap paper to give to their loved one so they won’t be thought a scrooge.

I used to work in retail and had a very firsthand view of the mean-spirited search for consumer packaged goods. Whatever delusions of “Christmas spirit” shoppers embody at home or church, they ditch them when they enter the store on a mission for sale-priced goods. I once helped a woman to her vehicle with a large item, and the whole way to her car she did nothing but bitch and complain about how every store was sold out of the things she “needed” (her words). Then right as she was getting into her car, she made sure to say “God bless!” Really? You search frantically for items to give as gifts, and you think that somehow fits in with the Christian celebration of the birth of Jesus? I don’t understand how people reconcile all of these hateful, vengeful, and competitive feelings with the peace and mercy that is supposedly at the heart of the holiday.

Like several other atheists and non-believers I know, I celebrate Christmas, but I celebrate it as a secular holiday whose main tenet is togetherness and time with family. Yes, we exchange gifts, but we do so on a very limited scale. The whole point of a peaceful gift exchange is lost if you fight tooth and nail to acquire some last minute item. Besides, Black Friday or not, you can almost always find better deals on the internet than you can in brick-and-mortar stores anyway.

Only 359 days until next Christmas. So that means only about 300 days before the next phony “War on Christmas” begins.

Have a safe and Happy New Year!

FarmVille Hates Baby Jesus!

farmvilleFor those of you who are not familiar with FarmVille, it is a game on the social networking site Facebook. For those of you who are not familiar with Facebook, I’m not sure this whole internet thing is for you. Anyway, FarmVille allows users to create virtual farms with crops, animals, trees, and buildings. One of the ways the developers keep the game fresh is to introduce seasonal items for users to purchase with in-game currency. In the past, these have included Halloween decorations and Thanksgiving-themed animals and decorations. It would stand to reason then, that the Christmas holiday would also have a prominent theme.

The application has drawn some criticism in the past from users in countries other than the United States because their local cultures did not celebrate Halloween or Thanksgiving. Now, the complaints are coming from Christians who feel like FarmVille is desecrating their sacred commercial holiday by allowing users to place presents under a “holiday tree” in the game.

  1. The developers of FarmVille can do whatever they want. Just because it’s known as a Christmas tree to you and millions of others does not mean that they can’t call it a “holiday tree.” If you don’t like it, unadd their application. It’s just a pointless time waster anyway.
  2. I personally think changing “Christmas” to “Holiday” is stupid. I celebrate Christmas as a time to be with family and enjoy gift exchange. The origin is not relevant to my celebration or my choice of nomenclature.
  3. Speaking of origins, many Christians fail to pause and consider how exactly it is that an evergreen tree and a fat elf dressed in red came to be a part of the baby Jesus story. These traditions have Pagan roots and are a result of Christian efforts to assimilate Pagans into Christianity.
  4. Why do Christians get so bent out of shape because someone chooses to secularize a portion of this tradition? I don’t think baby Jesus would have thought much of the mad rushes on Black Friday, gluttony, and egg nog. Christmas is, and for a long time has been, a secular holiday. There are just those that still preserve some religious aspects of it.
  5. Shut up! You are not being persecuted!

My friend Megan, who apparently enjoys headaches, emailed one of the upset FarmVille users to call him out on his stupidity. Expecting nothing less, I was not at all shocked to read his reply to Megan, which was also incoherent, poorly worded, and off-topic. He accused her of bigotry and hatemongering, all the while spewing an equal amount of vitriol at non-believers. Megan wrote him back proving that she has more patience than I. Here is his first reply to Megan, supposedly addressing how the Christmas tree is in fact a Christian symbol.

There is no other source of origin of the traditional Christmas tree other than Christian culture, in fact the entire ‘holiday season” is based on our Christian heritage.

Perhaps if you would like to create another holiday season, choose another shrub and decorate it with non- tradtional Christian decorations, such as free condoms, free needles, government vouchers for things like government housing, government cheese etc.

Or just don’t bother having a holiday season at all, after all, there is no logical reason to have one if you aren’t a Christian. It’s a shame that this country’s Christian culture is being destroyed in the name of “respect for other cultures”, which is nothing but a bloody lie. After all, to respect other cultures would mean respecting our own Christian culture- which is the foundation of this nation- as well.

There is no “War on Christmas.” However, there does seem to be a war being waged by Christians called the “War on Everything that Doesn’t Align With My Worldview.” This is a free market economy (for the most part). If some retailer says “Holiday Sale” instead of “Christmas Sale” and it makes you angry – Don’t Fucking Shop There! If a radio station only plays Santa-themed Christmas songs and no Jesus-themed Christmas songs – Don’t Fucking Listen to Them! And for crying out loud, if some dumb Facebook game calls their seasonal fir something different than you would like – Don’t Fucking Play It!

Christians need to stop trying to get everyone to bend to their will. If these companies really want their business badly enough, they’ll change their ways. Otherwise, Christians need to realize that perhaps they need to choose their battles a little more wisely.

So go spray fake snow on your windows, string up thousands of lights on your house, put large curved and extruded peppermints on your lawn, drink egg nog until you barf, and listen to Bing Crosby sing “Home for the Holidays” and reflect on how all of that fits into baby Jesus’ grand scheme.

Warning: This post contained strong language.