I’m in the process of moving, so my next update may not be for a few days. You know how fun packing and cleaning is, don’t you?
humor
Another Hit for SMBC
Original comic found at Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal.
One Fatwa Coming Up!
I usually despise email forwards of all kinds, funny or not, but my father brought this to my attention and I just couldn’t NOT pass this along.
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A Muslim dies and finds himself before the Pearly Gates.
He is very excited, as all his life he has longed to meet the Prophet Mohammed.
Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, he meets a man with a beard.
“Are you Mohammed?” he asks.
“No, my son. I am Peter. Mohammed is higher up.”
And he points to a ladder that rises into the clouds.
Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than Peter,
he climbs the ladder in great strides,
climbs through the clouds coming to a room
where he meets another bearded man.
He asks again, “Are you Mohammed?”
“No, I am Moses. Mohammed is higher up.”
Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy.
he continues to climb the ladder and, yet again,
he discovers an even larger room
where he meets another man with a beard.
Full of hope, he asks again, “Are you Mohmamed?”
“No, I am Jesus…You will find Mohammed higher up.”
Mohammed higher than Jesus!
The poor man can hardly contain his delight and climbs
and climbs, ever higher. Once again, he reaches an even larger room
where he meets a man with a beard and repeats his question:
“Are you Mohammed?” he gasps, as he is, by now,
totally out of breath from all his climbing.
“No, my son….I am God. But you look exhausted.
Would you like a coffee?”
“Yes, please, my Lord.”
God looks behind him, claps his hands and calls out:
“Hey, Mohammed, two coffees!”
Some More Bill Maher Quotes
My friend sent me some Bill Maher quotes a while back which I posted for your enjoyment. Stop holding your breath, because she sent me some more for me to share.
New Rule: If churches don’t have to pay taxes, they also can’t call the fire department when they catch fire. Sorry, Reverend, that’s one of those services that goes along with paying in. I’ll use the fire department I pay for; you can pray for rain.
If you believe Jesus ever had a good word for war or torture or tax cuts for the rich, or raping the earth, or refusing water to dying migrants, then you might as well believe bunnies lay painted eggs.
Sam Brownback, Mike Huckabee and Tom Tancredo – those are the three guys who said they do not believe in evolution. And the irony will be on them when their campaigns die off in favor of stronger, fitter campaigns.
I always say, “You know what? So what if you love Jesus. Would Jesus love you?”
I know the “morals and values” folks want us to take time out of the school day for prayer and the Ten Commandments and abstinence training, and to learn at least two theories of evolution – the one agreed upon by every scientist in the world, and the one that involves naked ladies and snakes.
The Kansas School Board again is trying to pass a resolution replacing teaching of evolution with the teaching of “creationism.” They pointed out today in the meeting that no one actually ever saw evolution happen. They also passed a resolution that says your feet disappear when you put on shoes.