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GodisPretend.net is 4 Years Old!

I hadn’t really realized how long I had been running this site until I looked up a few older posts a few weeks ago. This website has changed shape, servers, and domain names in those four years, but the central theme has stayed the same: religion is inherently violent and has no place in modern civilized society. As sort of a blast from the past, I present to you the first four blog posts I ever made on this site.

Subservience of Women
“What better move to make when writing the bible than to include a post to keep women in submission for all of time than to include the obligatory “men are better than women” verse.

The first epistle to Timothy brings us this travesty.” (Read More)

Evolution vs. Creation
“Life. Where did it come from? What does it have in store for me? What can I expect after life on earth?

Don’t know. It depends. Decomposition.” (Read More)

Don’t Pray For Me, Argentina
“I’ve got to hand it to Christianity. They have a pretty good racket setup. What most likely started as a simple way to keep the uneducated working class in check has become a self-perpetuating machine with all the right gimmicks built right in. Such as ‘We are right. Everyone else is wrong.’ Gotta love that one. No tolerance for diversity, no compassion for your fellow man, no ‘love thy neighbor’ (wait a tick…)” (Read More)

What Foxholes?
“You’ve probably all heard it. “There are no atheists in foxholes.” Oh really? What foxholes? And why wouldn’t they be down there? Are foxholes lined with Holy Water or some atheist repellant? I understand what this message is trying to convey, but that doesn’t make it anymore based in fact. The fact that people keep repeating this drivel only continues to lend to its credibility.” (Read More)

God is a Murderer

This post isn’t much; just a list of examples that illustrate that the Abrahamic God is a sordid murderer. Someone sent me these a loooong time ago, and I cannot recall the source. If you know where these came from, please let me know.

  • 1 Kings 20:30 : God makes a wall fall on and kill 27 000 of an army retreating from some Israelites.
  • 2 Kings 2:23-24 : 42 children are killed for calling a prophet “baldy”, by two she-bears.
  • Judges 20:35 : The Lord smote the armies of Benjamin resulting in the death of 25,100 solders.
  • 2 Samuel 6:6-11 : God kills someone for accidentally touching the Ark of the Covenant.
  • Genesis 6:17 : “Behold, I, even I am bringing the flood of water upon the earth, to destroy all flesh in which is the breath of life, from under heaven; everything that is on the earth shall perish”
  • Genesis 19:24-25 : “Then the LORD rained on Sodom and Gomorrah brimstone and fire from the LORD out of heaven, and He overthrew those cities, and all the valley, and all the inhabitants of the cities, and what grew on the ground.”
  • Exodus 12:29-30 : “Now it came about at midnight that the LORD struck all the firstborn in the land of Egypt, from the firstborn of Pharaoh who sat on his throne to the firstborn of the captive who was in the dungeon, and all the firstborn of cattle. Pharaoh arose in the night, he and all his servants and all the Egyptians, and there was a great cry in Egypt, for there was no home where there was not someone dead.”
  • Numbers 14:12 : Because of Israel’s unbelief and refusal to enter into the promised land, God said, “I will smite them with the pestilence.” Numbers 14:36-37 And the men whom Moses sent to spy out the land, who returned and made all the congregation grumble against him by bringing up a bad report about the land–the men who brought up a bad report of the land–died by plague before the LORD.
  • 2 Kings 17:25 : God sent lions that attacked and killed men who refused to fear God.
  • 2 Kings 19:34-35 : 185,000 Assyrians were killed in one night by an angel of the Lord.

If you know of any more instances of murder, genocide, or crass cruelty, post them in the comments and I’ll add them to the list.

The Search for Christian Kitsch: A Call to Action

pajamasI’m sure everyone has seen the Prayer Cross on television or around the web. If not, it’s about time you came out from under that rock.

There is so much more tacky Christian decor out there just waiting to be exposed. I’m sure you’ve seen some of it in gift shops, drug stores, and mail order catalogs. That’s why Sarah Trachtenberg (from Not My God) and I have decided to host a little contest to see who can dredge up the best piece of Christian Kitsch. Photos are preferable, but detailed descriptions will work too. And this needs to be authentic Christian Kitsch, not photoshopped pictures, homemade crafts, or atheist parody items. We’re talking about things that have been marketed to Christians as serious products (and I use the word ‘serious’ loosely).

Now what kind of contest would it be without a prize? The prize is this snowglobe of Santa Claus visiting the manger of baby Jesus. Just kidding! The actual prize is a scarlet A t-shirt a la The Out Campaign.

Who’s game? Post your findings in the comments or post a link to your personal blog with your findings. Also, be sure to head over to SarahTrachtenberg.com to check out other great submissions!

Update: Contest ends May 7th!

Shady Land Deal in the Bible

I came across an interesting Bible passage today. Matthew 13:44 states, “Again, the kingdom of heaven is like unto treasure hid in a field; the whech when a man hath found, he hideth, and for joy thereof goeth and selleth all that he hath, and buyeth that field.”

This, to me, seems to be very un-Christian behavior. Finding treasure on someone else’s land, concealing it, withholding knowledge of such from the rightful owner, and then buying the property to gain ownership. This reeks of dirty dealing, secrecy, and back stabbing; things I was always led to believe were not becoming of good Christians. Moreover, the man that said the above quote is Jesus himself. So God (via his son) condones this sort of behavior.

Say the above happened, and this asshole bought the land with the treasure. I would like to know if any kind of mineral rights existed in ancient Palestine. Would simply purchasing the parcel of land entitle one to any treasures that were contained below the surface? If petroleum, gold, silver, uranium, etc. are to be considered precious commodities, then certainly a treasure comparable to heaven would be included in such rights.

Yes, I know that is an absurd comparison, but, to me, it illustrates that people, including Jesus Christ himself, will say anything to make the prospect of an afterlife as appealing as possible. By appealing to mankind’s lust for treasure and conquest, Jesus lays out a situation in which an underhanded transaction takes place with clearly concealed ulterior motives with the goal of enjoying a treasure while excluding others from said enjoyment. If this passage is to mean anything else, then it could have been written so many different ways.

Of course, no matter how much Jesus was trying to wow his starry-eyed observers, he certainly resorted to an appeal to force mere passages later with, “So shall it be at the end of the world: the angels shall come forth, and sever the wicked from among the just, and shall cast them into the furnace of fire: there shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth.” (Matthew 13:49-50)

When push comes to shove, if the promise of treasure can’t convince someone to do something, threatening to burn them eternally should prove a useful tool of persuasion.